It's 5am here and the next round of kidding is in the offing- we are on baby watch and bleary eyed to say the least. I am making it through with the help of medication for my Spina Bifida- don't worry, it is the 'occulta' kind that we found on a x-ray in the 80's, so I can still function. It has been a quick two weeks since the last two does kidded and all girls. 4 of them, Annie and Laurie, and Lucy and Ethel. Yeah, I know- Lucy and Ethel's daddy was named Desperado, called 'Desi'- someone had to do the obvious. :-)
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There comes a time for most folks that it is also painfully obvious that working with people becomes a big chore- which is why I like living in the woods, away from most type A's. Some folks take nasty medications to help them deal with other people's personalities. And some folks just keep going into the same rut with the same type of people that have no respect. These folks are generally really good people, but they tend to be enablers- 'give give give give give' all day long to folks who have no intention of returning the exchange. I fall into that catagory. I own it. I do come by it honestly- growing up, my mom was an enabler- her thing was money/food/stuff= love. Dad did his best to keep her satisfied (he couldn't), but his own addiction to 'more more more more' was too strong. His addiciton became hers in short order- it happens when you don't have much when you are growing up and then suddenly have everything you want.
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Lest I become maudlin, here is the point of the story- and it is about goats. Some years ago, when I had been in goats for only a few years, I had done some trading around- 'a goat for a goat' sort of thing with another person. I registered that animal I traded for with the name I chose and used him. When I was done with the buck that I had traded for, I asked the person if they wanted the buck back- they said yes. Of course, my goats were long gone by then- this gave them everything and left me with nothing, so we agreed verbally that I'd get back equal value of some sort- goat equipment, etc. That was OK, since I trusted the person.
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Sometime during the next couple of years, the person's spouse got hurt on the job and they began to sell off their animals. That's alright, I said, I am patient, I know you will keep your word. So, over the next couple of years after that, each time I would ask for the trade to be honored- either following an advertisement for their equipment for sale or on my own- the person would say 'we need the money'. OK, I thought, they are still in a tight situation, I am patient, I know they are honorable. Even last summer when I asked after an ad for more equipment being sold, I was told again 'we need the money'- this was getting way too old.
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So most recently, I saw yet another ad for more equipment and I went a bit further in asking by also asking folks publically to wait until I could bring this to a head privately. Interestingly enough, the person now said that I must be mistaking them for someone else- they did not owe me anything and refused to even deal with the subject. OK. Let's examine this from a persective of 'letting go'- In the end, it is all just 'stuff' after all.
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Doing business on a handshake used to be the norm everywhere- today, it ain't so common. I recognize that this went on way too long, but from the perspective of the other person, I know I could not live with myself if I did not honor a situation, no matter how long it had gone on- my connection with God is way too strong to not recognize that I would be very much out of Grace to not make it right in the other person's mind as best I could. NOTE: This may discount stupidity on the part of the other person who will not understand, no matter what you do since some folks cannot be taught- this is where a written contract or bill of sale comes in, but I digress and that's another story- whooo boy, is that another story.
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The lesson, for business purposes, is to always get it in writing. And make sure each party has a signed copy of the agreement.
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The lesson, for spiritual purposes, is to 'trust in God, but always tie your camel' (old Arab saying). IE. keep the beast tied. If things do not work out as agreed and you are the one that gets the short end of the stick, let it go and let God take care of it. Be nice, let the folks know you see what they are doing and that you deplore their lack of honor, but do it nicely. God will take care of it in the fullness of time. Then go and do more work for the good.
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Cherokee Wisdom
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A Grandfather and his grandson were sitting under a tree, fishing by a stream. The Grandfather
said to his grandson, 'Inside of everyone there are two wolves fighting each other. One is an evil, angry wolf. The other is a kind, benevolent wolf.'
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The grandson thought a minute and said, 'Grandfather, which wolf wins?'
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The Grandfather paused a moment and answered, 'The one that I feed.'